Friday, May 21, 2021

CONGRATULATIONS CLASS OF 2021!!!

 MY ADVICE TO GRADUATES...

As someone who has been around for half a century, my wisdom goes way back. In fact, the first bit of advice I am going to impart to you comes from a quote that was posted on the wall of my sixth grade classroom, “It is Better to Remain Silent and Appear the Fool than to Open Your Mouth and Remove all Doubt.” Now, that’s not to say you should never speak up in life, and never be afraid to raise your hand (teachers and professors love audience participation). However, there are certainly times when keeping quiet is the better choice. If you don’t believe me, check out Mike Birbiglia’s stand-up show called (funnily enough), “What I Should Have Said was Nothing.” (Tales from my Secret Public Journal) on Netflix.  https://www.netflix.com/title/70091304 

Then in high school I was like most teenagers that when I turned the golden age of 16 I signed up for Driver’s Ed, more out of a sense of obligation and peer pressure than any real desire to get behind the wheel of a car and be in charge of a two ton death machine (dramatic, maybe, but this was a responsibility I took pretty seriously and still do). Anyway, I remember two pieces of advice from my gym teacher/driving instructor: “Never assume.” By that he meant, just because you see a car approaching with its turn signal on, never assume they’re going to turn. They could just be one of those absent-minded drivers that turned it on six blocks ago and forgot to turn it off. Also, you’re lucky if the car in front of you even opts to use their turn signal, hence the reason for allowing one car length between you and the car in front of you. 

The second piece of advice was “always change your tire yourself” as this is a basic skill everyone should know how to do. So, what happened the first time we got a flat when we (me and my fellow classmates) got a flat during a driving lesson? We drove to a gas station and let a mechanic change it for us. Incidentally, I once got a flat after having a nail lodged in my brand new tire, so what did I do? Yes, that’s right, I called Roadside Assistance. Although I know where my spare tire and jack are located, there’s no chance in Hell I would be able to safely change the tire in anything less than several hours probably (and I didn’t fancy it on the cold winter day it happened). That’s why we pay for that service as part of our car insurance. So kids, my advice to you is maybe learn how to do it and definitely know where your tire and jack are located, and be able to access them, but at the end of the day it’s probably best left to the professionals if you have that luxury. 

Moving on…. 

Never be afraid to learn something new whether it’s a job skill or just a fun hobby because you never know what it could lead to - from something as major as a new vocation or a promotion at your company to an enriching way to spend your spare time. You’re never too old to learn and these days you have a lot more options from in-person learning to You Tube videos to old schoolin’ it by reading a book about it. (below - my new hobby as an amateur barista)

Get out there and meet as many people as possible. You can never have too many friends. College is definitely the best place to practice this and is certainly the most natural setting since that’s kind of what the purpose of college is (besides earning a diploma of course). Some of these people might become friends for life (and not just sorority sisters and fraternity brothers), so reach out and get to know your peers. A special shout-out to my college friend, Valerie, whom I still keep in touch with to this day. Glad I met you at Kent all those years ago when we were young and still hadn’t really started our lives yet. 

While you’re doing this, don’t be afraid to be daring and bold. Make memories. You should start this sooner rather than later or you will have nothing to talk about at your class reunions. Not everyone will have a high school experience like those depicted in a John Hughes film (Bueller, Bueller, Bueller…), but do what you can outside the classroom. Go out for sports or join an organization, then hang out with your classmates on the weekend. Pull a few harmless pranks (but make it more daring than doing a Greg Brady by stealing your arch rival’s school mascot and hiding it in your attic bedroom).

Participate in Senior Skip Day (not sure that’s still a thing though) or Water Pistol Wars or whatever they’re calling it where you try to squirt your friends and classmates at their homes. 

I had a former coworker who encouraged his kids to never accept less than the best. That’s fine, but until diamonds and gold are bestowed upon you, be grateful for what you get. Also, until you can afford Tiffany’s and Barney’s, I’ll see you at Target and Walmart. This goes for jobs too. Unless your daddy owns the company, be prepared to start at the bottom and work your way up. Also, never forget those who helped you along the way, and try not to burn your bridges. 

Give back to your community and try to make time for charitable acts, and don’t just do them to score points with your boss or significant other. Do it from your heart because you feel grateful and genuinely want to help. That will shine through and pay dividends far exceeding recognition from the charity. This is also an excellent way to fill in the time between jobs and always looks good on a resume, as well as providing you a sense of purpose until your next paycheck, or after your last one if you’re retired. 

Really most of these things are common sense (which, isn’t necessarily spread evenly among people), and you can’t do wrong if you follow the Golden Rule (do onto others…) 


My last piece of advice comes from one of my comedic idols, Rodney Dangerfield, who said in his college commencement address (“Back to School”), “It’s rough out there! Move back with your parents and let them worry about it!”

CONGRATULATIONS RHYS!!!  (my nephew and God son)



Sunday, May 2, 2021

ALL THINGS BOOKS!!!

I sat down to write this week’s blog post, but as sometimes happens when one sits down to write and one is on a computer, it’s easy to get distracted and wander off. I wish I could say the purpose was ‘research,’ (though in a way it was), but instead it was book shopping – trying to choose what would be the most rewarding for the least cost and in paperback. A couple hours or so later I finally made my selections (on Thrift Books and Amazon.com) and pulled the trigger. Now I just have to sit back and watch my mailbox. 

As you might have guessed, this month’s topic is BOOKS. It all started with a trilogy of classes I signed up for through Upper Arlington Parks & Recreation called Building Your Personal Library being taught by Rich Simpson whose credentials were simply listed as ‘Experienced Bibliophile.’ 

This much was evident from my observation on the Zoom call that night. Rich was sitting in a wide aisle between two rather large library-sized bookshelves. Since I wasn’t sure if he was holding the class remotely or at home, I asked. He said it was his home library. I was duly impressed (except for the fact that most of the books appeared to be law books and other equally dry subject matter due to the lack of color on their covers). 

One of my classmates that evening was Rich’s friend, Alan who told us he had a rather large home library as well with shelves in most rooms including the hallway. The last two houses my in-laws lived in were like that with book shelves in most rooms lined with lots of vintage orange Penguin paperbacks along with other well-aged novels and miscellaneous subjects. Although I love books, I am of the type of personality that prefers my items to all be corralled in one room, if possible. When we found our house many moons ago now, and I saw that the room behind the living room had built-in bookshelves,

it was love at first sight as I immediately had dreams of commandeering that room for my home library. I ended up having to wait several years because my husband needed a home office, so he snapped it up first. Eventually he changed jobs and went to work outside the home, so we gradually got rid of the desk that took up a good third of the room. I then went online and ordered a couple nice bookshelves to match the built-ins, and the rest is history. 

Anyway, I digress. Back to the class – the first class was called “Libraries and Book Collecting,” and the description said: “Do you love books? What kind are meaningful to you? Are you an “accumulator” or a “collector”? Why bother keeping a book on your shelf? This session helps answer these questions and includes a discussion of the history of libraries and book collecting.”

After getting to know each other a bit, the instructor launched into a history of paper and book making (most of which I already knew, so I struggled to look engaged), then he showed examples of books from his collection and why one book might be more valuable than another. I learned that most books only have a first edition, but books that do go into a second or third print run certainly makes the first editions more valuable. Of course you can learn a bit about why certain books are valuable if you watch shows like "The Antiques Road Show." I seem to recall a first edition signed copy of "To Kill a Mockingbird" being worth thousands of dollars - not surprising.

I’ll be honest, I skipped the second class and the third class got cancelled. The second class was called “The Value of a Book.” (description: "What makes a book valuable or worth keeping? Discussion focuses on the many factors that go into making a book worth keeping. Participants learn by inspecting examples.") I don’t buy books as investments and tend not to spend much more than $20 (which is rare for me to even spend that much). I am all about quantity, rather than quality.

I have to say, as bored as I was with the first class, Rich did inspire me to go online and have another search for a favorite childhood book. The search was fruitful as I found a well-loved (i.e., duct taped binding) copy of a Golden Book for about $8 and some change. I could have gotten a nicer copy (though still only fair by industry standards) for $35, but felt sorry for this lesser version.


Plus, it's not like all my childhood books are in pristine condition. I still kick myself for putting a piece of masking tape on "Flat Stanley" which says "C" - might have been part of my initials at one point but the “C” is all that's still legible.


The same day as the last class (Monday) I heard on NPR that Bexley Library was having Susan Orlean speak in their Community Author Series the following day (Tuesday). I decided my time would be better spent trying to read as much of The Library Book (the 2018 book about the 1986 Los Angeles Public Library fire) as possible, so I called in sick to the class (not proud of that, but I rarely ever do that, so I am letting myself off the hook here), grabbed my paperback, and headed out to our patio to read.

I’m glad I did since much of what Orleans talked about was familiar from having just read it. She was an excellent and engaging speaker and inspired me to look up some of her books and add them to my reading list.

By the way, since this event was free and open to the general public, I emailed a link to the event to my uncle in California, who was kind enough to give me his copy of The Library Book many years ago, but until now I hadn’t gotten around to reading. He joined me (and 500 others) on the Zoom call and we periodically texted a few comments. I think he enjoyed it as much as I did.

The other recent book event was The Ohioana Book Festival which was held April 22-25 (http://www.ohioana.org/programs/ohioana-book-festival/) strictly online, same as last year. I had a quick look at the schedule and selected a few panels I thought might be interesting. Because they’re all recorded anyway, you have the option of viewing them on You Tube at your leisure.

I was able to tune in live to the Cozy Mystery panel which was broadcast on Saturday morning. My husband was kind enough to make me a mocha (on Monty our beloved espresso machine) so I could sip it while enjoying the program. The description of the program pretty much dictated that you have a beverage in hand, so when in Rome!  “Grab a cup of tea and your favorite furry friend to enjoy this discussion with a group of Ohio’s most beloved cozy mystery authors.” (my cat preferred to nap elsewhere, so no kitty on my lap for this one).

I’ll be honest, I like the idea of a cozy mystery more in theory than in practice as I’ve only ever read a couple (though I enjoyed them both), but it’s always fun to hear about the various author’s processes and get a sneak peek at some of the plotlines and characters. One of the authors revealed that she always warns her friends that something they say might show up in one of her books. Another of the authors said it would be her dream to be locked up in a library overnight. That would definitely be my dream too. In fact, that happened to one of my favorite characters in a sitcom, but that was because he was running late to do research on a college term paper, so he inadvertently got locked in (but I seem to recall he had female companionship that evening, so his evening went off in a different direction than mine would have).

In case you’re curious what I’m reading now, I have set aside The Library Book (by Susan Orlean) as my friend and I just formed a two-person book club (though it’s open to anyone else who would care to join) to read I Thought You Said This Would Work by Ann Garvin. 

I am also reading 365 Devotions to Savor by Shauna Niequist. Several of the daily devotions have coincided with events going on in my life, which is an interesting coincidence and makes me think the universe is definitely paying attention to me. They also say that a lot of times the right book finds you when you need it. However, I bought this book a couple years ago, and only now (January 1st) finally picked it up. Although it has some religious overtones and a lot about the author’s marriage and home life with her child, I still find much of it relatable. 

If you’re a fan of all things books and libraries I can definitely recommend The Library Book. You do, however, have to tolerate a lot of tangents off in different directions (like a whole section about past and present directors of the library and the role the library plays in the community, etc.). It’s an easy book to dip in and out of, so one to enjoy in spare moments of leisure time. 


I only just started I Thought You Said This Would Work by Ann Garvin, but am enjoying it so far. I made a casual resolution to read more novels (my preference is usually towards memoirs and collections of essays), which seems to be how most of my family leans. 

My mom said she’s never read as many books as she did last year when the pandemic started. I recommended a couple authors to her (Lisa Scottoline & her daughter Francesca Serritella) and my mom has had nothing but praise for Scottoline’s books (mysteries). My dad is more of a John Grisham and James Patterson fan. I’m not sure if my sister has a favorite author, but I think she and I probably read a lot of the same authors growing up – Judy Blume and Beverly Cleary. She seems to prefer novels too and often reads what’s currently popular. 

I think my bad habit of accumulating books has rubbed off on my sister as I have seen a tower of paperbacks in her master bedroom. My mom told me she is anxious to go back to the library* even though she still has plenty of books to read at home. Me too mom! 

*(I think their library up in NE Ohio has mostly stayed open, whereas ours closed during the pandemic and has only been open for pick-ups until fairly recently). 

I recently subscribed to an excellent magazine which is free of all advertising and is devoted exclusively to articles about the joys of reading and all things books. It’s called Oh Reader, and there’s been three issues out to date. For more info, here’s a link:  https://www.ohreader.com/about 


While on the subject of books, I can recommend an excellent somewhat book-themed movie called “Liberal Arts” which was filmed here in Ohio – mostly on the campus of Kenyon college, but one scene was filmed at the now defunct Acorn Books in Grandview (I wrote a previous blog post about that in 2018 which you can find in my archives). There’s a funny discussion about the value (or in this case, lack thereof) of the “Twilight” book series. As a Harry Potter fan, I was a bit disdainful of them at first, but after I saw the first “Twilight” movie, I became a fan and have added the series to my books to read list. 


I can also recommend “The Bookshop,” which came out in 2017, though it’s definitely not one of the  more cheerful films, but it is set in a bookshop in England, so if you like period dramas and all-star casts, this is a good movie to rent/stream. 

In addition, there are several excellent documentaries about books on Amazon Prime. One of my favorites was about the people who sell books from tables or the sidewalk on various streets in Manhattan, or at least used to, because I think the city has since shuffled them off to greener pastures. There’s another program about the whole world of book collecting and the conventions devoted entirely to antique and rare books. Some of these people buy up these books and then store them in giant warehouses, which seems just a little bit selfish to me. I hope some of them eventually bequeath their collections to libraries. 

Well, that should be enough recommendations to get you started. I would love to hear what you’re reading and any movie/documentary recommendations.